Grief is a natural response to losing someone important in your life. It is a feeling of sadness, loneliness, emptiness, anger, or just feeling lost. Some days you feel a lot of emotions all at once and some days you feel a little better than others.
With the Holidays just passed and you think you’re getting better at dealing with the day-to-day up comes Valentine’s day.
Valentine’s day can often be hard when you have lost a loved one. It can often be harder for new widows or widowers.
Even if you didn’t celebrate valentine’s day with your loved one, it is a constant reminder of your relationship and memories of being together.
If you are finding the run up to Valentine’s Day a bit difficult, here are a few things you to think of:
1. It’s okay to feel miserable during this time. It’s okay to feel miserable once in a while. Don’t feel pressured to pretend to be happy or pretend to be okay. If you feel like crying, cry as much as you like until you feel ready to stop. You are going through a hard time and you have to give yourself some room to let your feelings out.
2. Accept Valentine’s day as a day for love and showing appreciation to all. It doesn’t have to be linked to romantic love. You can invite a few friends or family members around and catch up or have a meal as a show of appreciation and love towards them.
3. Make time to do something that makes you feel happy. Engage in exercise, watch a movie, read a book, write in a journal or blog, or play video games.
4. If you have young children, spend time with them and let them pick an activity that they want to do (it doesn’t have to be expensive) and just enjoy they day with them.
5. Speak to someone about how you feel without fearing that they will judge you. Talking about your emotions can help. If you can’t think of anyone you know, you can try free support organisations like Cruse Bereavement Care or Bereavement Trust.
Not feeling up to it during Valentine’s day is not your fault. Don’t blame yourself for feeling bad on a day that people ‘should’ be happy.
Grief and bereavement is a process and each person copes differently. Just remember that your family and friends are there and you can reach out to them whenever you need them.